It actually won the award for Best Musical...which...at the very least...makes you wonder about the state of affairs in modern society...but...I digress. Now, I haven't seen it, and I can only imagine what kind of stuff they have in this play, but, what intrigued me, is the fact that, there are an estimated 8,000 swear words in the 90 minute show. 8000 in 90 minutes...let's do the math, shall we? 8000 swear words divided by 90 minutes is 88.88 swear words per minute, which is divided by 60 seconds per minute, giving us a total of 1.48 swear word per second. More than 1 swear words per second.... That's impressive... even from a Jerry Springer stand point. 8000 swear words with 3000 utterances of fuck and 1000 of cunt. The 'C' word! We all know the 'F' word...fuck. It's the most common, multi-use word. Fuck, fucker, fucking, fuck, fuck , fuck...no big. And you have to admit it is useful...and there's a respectable difference between "I'm pissed", and "I'm fucking pissed!". But cunt... Now that's a whole different thing...at least on this side of the Atlantic. Man over here if you call someone, most especially a woman, a...the 'c' word...all hell breaks loose man. Somethin' about that word. I remember I went to see 'An Officer and a Gentleman" when it was in the theaters years ago, I was trying to get laid...what do you want? I'm honest. Anyway. I'm watching the movie and it comes to the part where Richard Gere's best friend, played by David Keith, has killed himself 'cause his girlfriend dumped him, and Gere's confronting her with it, and she says, "I want a piiiilot, I wanna marry an ayeveeyater, I don't want no Okie from Muskokie!", and Gere says, "You little cunt!" I don't remember what he said after that cause I was too busy cheering. I don't vocalize at movies very often...but, I gotta admit...I was right there with him on that one...that word is reserved for special occasions...but that was definitely one of them. Needless to say...I didn't get laid.
Now on the other side of "the pond" it's a whole different thing, they actually make the word cunt sound reasonable almost elegant.
(accented) That cunt. That bloody cunt. Pesselhue, will you look at that cunt! None the less, the BBC is planning on airing the Opera on TV...and the English conservatives are going fucking bonkers. There calling it indecent, apparently there's a "Jesus" character whose "a little bit gay"..., and a few other tawdry bits that are ruffling some feathers. But, and here's where it gets fucked up, there is a Christian group in England that is claiming the last years tsunami disaster is the result of Gods wrath on the BBC for there decision to air this "Unholy" musical on a National Broadcast. I'm crapping you negative. I mean, come on, even Christians have to draw the line somewhere. Gee, wanna know why I have a problem with some Christians? Hmmm. Maybe it has something to do with a all powerful, all loving God, who in the blink of an eye dusts off 300,000 of his "children", because the British Broadcasting Company is going to show something distasteful. Yeah, sure, I can buy that...I'm in, where do I sign? Quick, quick...anoint my head! Anoint me. If God's prerequisite for natural disaster/global annihilation was bad TV...there'd be none of us left!!! Fuckin' christians...aren't they cute?
If you don't believe, exactly, according to these rules....YER GOING TO HELL! Damned to hell for all eternity! Hellfire and Damnation! Forever! Now, being that Christians make up about a third of the worlds population...that means that the other two-thirds is...well...fucked. And that people like Buddha, and Gandhi, and Confucius, and Socrates, and a lot of other really good people of other religious beliefs are back-stroking in the Lake of Fire! Yeah...I'm in. Where do I sign? Anoint me please!
1 comment:
god love you, Thunder Mouth.
I've been listening to your rants since I was 13 years old and I loved 'em then and love 'em even more now. your pal, zH
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